Soul Mates

There are people I have met in my life that I feel a deep connection with.  We may not have done everything together, but there was something that connected us to our souls, that I cannot explain except that It felt like we were destined to meet, to be there for one another.  One thing I know, Kaylee, that you won't forget when all of this is over is the friends you have been privileged to meet.

 Each one carries their own special stamp that leaves an impression on our hearts. We have met some pretty amazing people this time around.  People whose everyday life revolves around ANC, and CBC's, and WBC, and NED and all sorts of other complicated abbreviations just like us.  I am able to connect with the mom's about trying to carry on serious conversations with the morning round up doctors sporting bed head and morning breath, and you can chat with the kids about the strange taste that appears in your mouth when the nurse flushes saline through the port in your chest.

At our last treatment we got to spend lots of time with Maddie.  She had a wilms relapse the same time as us and our treatments finally lined up.  The nurses all joked about you two being the social bugs of the Hem/Onc wing, cause they could never find you in your rooms.  You two were so busy painting nails, doing crafts, going from one playroom to the next, and one hospital room to the next gliding this way and that on your IV poles.  She gave you the opportunity to be a normal kid, even at the hospital, just playing with your buddy.  She made the time pass by so fast, we couldn't believe it was time to go home after our 3 days were up. 

 

Then at our local hospital stay for your neutropenic fever (that's a fever with no immune system to fight off anything) we met Gunnison, who was in for the very same thing!  He was diagnosed the exact same day as your relapse with Neuroblastoma, a nerve cancer.  It didn't take playing but a few rounds of Would You Rather before you guys were attached.  It felt like were were at a college dorm with all the junk food and late nights and back and forth between rooms.  When it was finally time to go home you both actually looked disappointed, until you found out you could still play together since they live in our same town.  What a blessing to have such a good friend right near our home that you can spend those long isolated low count days and weeks with. 

And we cannot forget Brooke, who has Wilms also.  We met her at our first treatment.  She and you danced to "Call Me Maybe", and even got the nurses dancing along.  You had a popcorn movie party, and painted nails (a must for a hospital stay!).  Even though they live far from us, we are constantly keeping on top of her progress and she yours.

Each of your new friends, is a little blessing.... wait, not a little blessing, a huge blessing.  Seeing a gloomy hospital stay turn into a party, is a big thing when you have 20+ hospital stays in the upcoming year. 

 These, Kaylee, are wonderful kids. You all have dealt with more than a kid your age should have too, but you all do it with so much heart that you set an example for everyone around you.  There is an instant bond when you glide down the halls on your IV poles, or play games and discuss what it's like being bald, or squish onto the same hospital bed to watch a movie with someone. It's hard not to fall in love with these little warriors who mean so much to us, whether they are long distance or nearby they are your forever friends, your cancer buddies, and your soul mates.

Magic

The first day of chemo this round, we took a walk to the playroom and got there just in time for Bingo.  They had a TV camera all set up to broadcast it to all the kids in the hospital and behind the caller was an exciting spread of prizes for the winner.  When you called out, "Bingo!" you had your eyes on one prize in particular.  It was a Magic set.  We carried it to your room and started practicing tricks.  Once you got one right for me, you would try it out on a nurse or a tech.  Soon word got around about your magic tricks.  Nurses and hospital workers would make a special stop in your room to watch you make snacks appear in an empty box, or your wand turn magnetic right before their eyes.

Right now, we just finished your second round of chemo.  It's a month that by all accounts should be rough.  Surgery, Radiation and 2 rounds of 5 day chemo treatments should wear a person out.  But here it is 9 o'clock at night on your 5th day of chemo, and we are waiting for your the final drips of chemo to finish up, and you are dancing, singing, doing magic tricks for the nurses, and I am realizing that the real trick here is how you still have so much energy. 

It is no surprise to me that one of the Social Workers asked you to be the child Ambassador for the American Childhood Cancer Organization in Arkansas.  You get to be the poster child for cancer in Arkansas.  And really, if you are going to have cancer, why not do something positive with it?  It fits your personality perfectly.  You were able to have a photo shoot, and paint a picture to be auctioned of at a fancy gala.  Your grace and energy and spirit are constantly inspiring, not just to me, but to others we meet.  It is so fun to watch you shine, in even the toughest situation. 

 Your sparkling personality has a way of drawing people in.  Even at a routine stop at the gas station on our long ride home your few moments there brought a sweet crowd of workers.  As you sat on a chair giving your queasy stomach a rest before our final hour of driving, a nice lady asked how you were feeling and offered you a soda. Then she told you how strong and brave you are, and with her carrying voice told you you were gonna beat this cause you were a fighter. Her energy was like magic. It gave us a new wind, and when we got up to go, she cheered us on our way out the door cheering, "You can do it! You're almost home!" And just like that she conjured up the energy we needed to finish our long drive. 

You give a little magic and get a little magic.  That is something we have learned on this journey.
It's magic in the way people seem to know what we are missing or needing, and just like that we may get a phone call, a package or card in the mail, or a gift on the doorstep and like magic, something that we needed, or wished for, or never even thought of, but so dearly appreciated, was done for us. 

Now, of course, I know it's not real magic.  Like the tricks you practice to amaze your audience, we have angels around us, who are busy working their magic to make our lives a little easier during these hard times inspiring others or lifting us up, so that we know the Lord is looking out for us.  I've never been more certain of  His role in our lives.  He has surrounded us with angels here on earth and in heaven who cheer us on, and send that magic we need to finish this cancer once and for all.